Nigerian wedding guest FAQ: money spray, gele size, gift etiquette

Every Nigerian wedding produces the same text messages from first-time guests. Here are the actual answers, so you can walk in like you have done this before. If you want the full outfit rundown first, start with what to wear as a guest.

Can I spray money, and how does it work?

Yes, and you will want to. When the couple dances, guests come forward and rain single bills over them - it is celebration, not payment. Get small denominations, ones and fives, because the gesture is in the raining, not the total. Come with more singles than you think you need; nobody has ever regretted that. The money is gathered up for the couple, so it counts as part of your giving.

How big should my gele be?

Bigger than church, smaller than the bride's. A guest gele with height is completely correct at a wedding - this is the occasion the dramatic shapes exist for. If you cannot tie one or cannot be bothered, a pre-tied piece like a floral bouquet auto gele or a crystal trim gele gets you the silhouette in the time it takes to put on a hat. Sizing against the crowd is a real skill - we wrote about it in matching your gele to the aso-ebi.

There is aso-ebi. Do I still bring a gift?

Buying the aso-ebi fabric is already a form of support, and spraying at the reception is another. A boxed gift on top is warm but optional - many guests let the spray be the gift. If you skipped the aso-ebi, then a gift or a generous spray is the graceful move. What you should not do is arrive with empty hands and a big appetite.

What colours should I avoid?

Avoid whatever the couple's families have claimed as their colours unless you were given them, and do not wear all white unless the invitation asks for it. Everything else is fair game, and restraint is not really the assignment - a red coral set over the right dress is exactly the energy the room wants.

I am not Nigerian. Can I wear traditional?

Please do. Nothing honours the couple more than a guest who dressed for their culture. Men can step into a navy agbada without any ceremony training whatsoever - if it is your first one, read the agbada explained and walk in tall.

What time should I actually arrive?

The invitation time and the start time have a diplomatic relationship. Aim for the stated time anyway - being early at a Nigerian wedding is a quiet seat and first access to small chops, and there are worse fates.